


we lost the summer (when we lost each other)

by hyucksdream



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Happy Ending, Jisung is a sweetheart, Light Angst, M/M, Summer Romance, chenle works up the guts to stand up to his parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-21 23:40:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30029637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyucksdream/pseuds/hyucksdream
Summary: On Day 30 of Chenle’s vacation, he loads his car with significantly more clothes and knickknacks than he had brought and drives back towards the city, reminding himself that he can't turn around and drive straight back into Jisung’s arms, even when hot tears blur his vision and the lump in his throat makes it near impossible to breathe.(or, chenle and jisung spend a month together on the beach, over the summer, but all they have is a month. until chenle shows up at the beach a few weeks later.)
Relationships: Park Jisung/Zhong Chen Le
Comments: 1
Kudos: 36





	we lost the summer (when we lost each other)

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this last november but i didn't like how it turned out and let it rot in my gdocs, but 4 months is too long to hold onto a fic for me so i'm posting for peace of mind. and yes, this is loosely inspired by txt's we lost the summer!

Chenle rolls the window down, turning the ignition off and letting his hands drop from the steering wheel. He knows he shouldn’t be here, knows full well that spending the better part of his morning driving 4 hours out to the coast is something that shouldn’t have happened. But as the beachy, saline-soaked air reaches his nose, he can’t find it in himself to get irritated. 

The wind is a perfect amount of breezy today, and Chenle just breathes, undoing his cufflinks and rolling his sleeves up. The sandy area of the beach is fairly empty, as one would expect on a Tuesday morning, and Chenle is grateful for the privacy. 

His gaze subconsciously drifts over to the right side of the beach, where, beyond sandy hills is a restaurant and hotel. Where the boy he’s hopelessly infatuated with lives. 

Chenle hisses when he realizes what he’s doing, turning away to instead look at the tall cliff on the other side of the empty lot where he’s parked. 

Instantly, memories of him kissing Jisung as they rolled around in the grass infiltrate his mind, and he closes his eyes, leaning back against the headrest. 

This is a mistake. He’s well aware of this, but he can’t stop it. He couldn’t stop himself from storming out of his father’s office this morning, nothing but Jisung’s soft voice reminding him that “If it’s not something that interests you or makes you happy, don’t force yourself to do it,” running through his head on repeat. 

It’s a mistake, but Chenle can’t take back his feelings for Jisung, and honestly, he doesn’t want to. Chenle takes a deep breath, then gets out of his car, and starts walking towards the ocean. 

It happened like this. Chenle’s second year of university ended quietly, with him submitting assignments and tests from the safety of his room, him saying goodbye to his roommates and friends, then hightailing the hell out of the city. He had packed a measly bag with clothes, knowing he could always buy more out on the coast anyway. He waited until he was out of the city, leaving the polluted air, his internship, and his large collection of dress shirts and ties behind, before calling his mother, letting her know that he was taking a month-long break from everything.

“Zhong Chenle, you know your father won’t be happy with you,” she had said, though her voice had already taken on a defeated tone. 

“I’ll see you in a month, Mom. Tell Dad not to get too upset, he has a million other boys he can boss around while I’m gone,” Chenle had said, ending the call, feeling tons lighter as he rolled the windows down and let the breeze whip his hair around. He watched the sun go down as he cruised along in his car, hitting the gas to escape his problems quicker. 

On Day 1 of his vacation, Chenle bumps into a tall boy with soft pink hair and a strikingly sweet smile. Chenle isn’t one to shy away from strangers; he was conditioned from a young age to be open and welcoming to everyone around him, thanks to his father’s many meetings and parties, all that Chenle was forced to attend, so he starts a conversation. One hour turns into three, before they realize they’ve spent the whole day together. 

At the end of the day, when Chenle is just starting to think about where he might stay for the night, Jisung explains to Chenle how his parents own the hotel and restaurant and invites him to stay, which is perfect since Chenle’s only plan was to get in his car and drive. 

On Day 3 of Chenle’s vacation, after spending 3 full days with Jisung, he comes to the realization that he may be forming a small crush on the other boy. After learning that Jisung has just completed his second year in university as well, that he’s studying art (which Chenle finds scarily fitting), he finds himself diving headfirst into his feelings, throwing caution to the wind, embracing his true flirty nature. After all, he’s only here for a month. Why not make it worthwhile?

On Day 10 of Chenle’s vacation, he kisses Jisung. They’re both a little drunk, and after spending the day surfing and playing around in the ocean, they’re exhausted and spend the night talking about everything—how Chenle’s parents should’ve gotten divorced 15 years ago, how Jisung’s father refuses to allow Jisung to take over the family business, how the two of them have had nothing but failed love in their lives. Kissing Jisung is exhilarating, to the point where the tips of Chenle’s toes tingle when Jisung pulls at his hair.

By Day 18 of Chenle’s vacation, he finds himself soaking in his feelings for Jisung. Their relationship is exciting, Jisung makes Chenle feel treasured in a way he’s never felt before and every day comes with a special surprise with Jisung. Chenle’s head is clear, his heart is light, and his parents and his internship and the closet full of ties and dress shirts have completely left his mind. He’s truly happy, for the first time in the twenty years of his life. 

By Day 26 of Chenle’s vacation, all he can think about is his unyielding departure date. What had started as a drive with no destination had quickly turned into more, and now Chenle isn’t sure how to move forward. 

When he had started flirting with Jisung, genuine feelings weren’t something he had considered. But it was impossible to ignore them now. Still, Chenle shut down any thoughts that he and Jisung could make it work long-distance. Jisung didn’t have future plans to leave the small coastal town, and Chenle knew it was impossible to escape his father’s clutches and leave the city. 

So he tells Jisung to forget about him, hiding the ache of his own heart breaking. 

On Day 30 of Chenle’s vacation, he loads his car with significantly more clothes and knickknacks than he had brought and drives back towards the city. 

As he drives back, the cloud of pollution is an immediate damper on Chenle’s feelings, reminding him that there is always work to be done. He wishes that he had more time with Jisung, but the large dust clouds are always there to remind him that his father will personally hunt him down if he isn’t back in exactly a month. His father’s security detail is the sole reason Chenle doesn’t turn around and drive straight back into Jisung’s arms, even when hot tears blur his vision and the lump in his throat makes it near impossible to breathe. 

Now, Chenle drags his feet through the sand, the air around him significantly colder than it had been a month ago. It’s quiet, a few crabs scuttling over the sand dunes. He sees a mother jogging alongside the coast with her small son, the two of them laughing and leaning against each other as they search for seashells. 

Chenle remembers one day during his vacation when Jisung had convinced him to help him build a sandcastle. Jisung had built about half of the sandcastle when Chenle, who was feeling particularly playful, kicked in half of the sand, effectively collapsing the castle. Jisung had looked up at him with the biggest eyes, almost looking hurt enough to where Chenle was starting to regret ever doing anything, before a wicked smile had taken over Jisung’s face and before Chenle could even open his mouth, Jisung had taken his sand pail, filled it up with water, and dumped it on Chenle’s head. 

Chenle had stood there, surprise soaking his nerves more than anything else before he took off after Jisung, who was already halfway down the coast. They had chased each other for hours, dumping water on each other, laughing, and repeating the cycle, until the sun had set and they finally laid on the beach, shivering, but inching closer together with every gust of wind. 

It had been one of Chenle’s happiest days. 

He knows he shouldn’t be here. He knows that attending half of his 7 AM meeting then leaving in the middle of it wasn’t a decision he should have made, and driving the four hours out here should’ve been out of the question, but he couldn’t stop himself. 

He finds it funny, as he takes a seat on the sand, not minding the sand getting in his dress shoes, the rate at which his happiness increased as he got further away from the city. As soon as he got onto the highway, eastbound, nothing but rolling plains and distant hills in his periphery, the tension had instantly seeped out of his shoulders, and the permanent ball of stress in his chest had dislodged itself, the serotonin receptors finally properly functioning once again. 

The sun is out today, and Chenle can think of at least ten different memories that involved him and Jisung frolicking around the hiking trails, watching the sun rise, watching the sun set, relaxing at noon when the sun was at its full height. 

In all honesty, it isn’t like Chenle’s life is worse now than before his vacation. His father is still pretending like the internship Chenle has at his company isn’t just a ruse to wheedle him into taking over the company sooner. His mother is still asking him if he is dating someone every week, and his classes have just started up again, so he’s got another distraction from his feelings for Jisung. 

Everything seems to be the same as before. 

Except now that Chenle has experienced life the way he wants it—no dress clothes, no daily 7 AM meetings on behalf of a company that Chenle doesn’t want to inherit—and he can’t stop yearning for it. He’s tasted the forbidden fruit that his parents have tried to hard to keep away from him, and one taste is enough for Chenle to get addicted. Chenle can’t stop replaying his month’s worth of memories full of Jisung, Jisung’s lips, his voice, his warm hands, the way his eyes glimmer, everything. 

Chenle’s never been someone to feel deeply, but now, all he can do is feel. He wishes he could turn back time to last month. There’s nothing he would change, he just wants to experience it all again. Having free time, having freedom, having someone who cares about him as much as he cares for them. He wants to feel Jisung’s embrace again, he wants to catch Jisung smiling at him when Chenle’s looking elsewhere. 

He kicks some of the sand next to him, staring up at the sky, closing his eyes as the wind causes his hair to whip into his eyes. He’s wearing Jisung-tinted sunglasses, now, it feels like. Everything seems to relate back to Jisung in some way or another and Chenle feels like he’s slipping. 

“It’s hot out here, hyung. Why are you out here by yourself?” Chenle’s head whips up to find Jisung smiling down at him. 

Oh. He’s so pretty. Jisung’s pale pink hair seems freshly touched-up, and his eyes are sparkling as he takes a seat on the sand next to Chenle. He seems pleasantly surprised, but he isn’t taken aback in the slightest. 

“You—what are you doing here?” Chenle sputters, eyes wide. 

The sparkle in Jisung’s eyes is still there, but the smile on Jisung’s face is twinged with sadness. He’s looking down at the sand, picking up a handful at a time, then letting it slip through his fingers. 

“I live here, hyung,” he says with a small smile. 

Chenle’s heart clenches painfully, another reminder that he shouldn’t be here, and he absolutely shouldn’t be talking to Jisung now. All he’s doing is making it harder for himself to get over Jisung, reminding himself every second of everything he loves about Jisung.

He nods, looking down at his feet. His dress shoes are already in bad shape, and he already pulled his tie off in the car. If his parents saw him now, he knows exactly what they would be saying, and none of it would be nice. 

He glances down at his watch—if he leaves now, he can make it back to catch a few of his afternoon meetings. That’s what he should do.

Chenle’s debating whether or not he should turn around, kiss Jisung one last time, and sprint back to his car before he decides to never leave again, but then he feels Jisung’s head drop down on his shoulder, and he stills, blood freezing in his veins. 

Fuck his weak heart. And fuck Jisung for being the sweetest person on the planet. 

“How long are you staying, Chenle?” Jisung asks, and though Chenle wishes he couldn’t, he can hear hope coloring Jisung’s voice where he tried and failed to cover it up. 

Chenle can’t possibly leave now. He turns to look at Jisung, who still has his head leaning on Chenle’s shoulder. He should make one last effort to get up, to drive home, back to the city, but in his heart, he’s already given in. His eyes are focused on the waves just a few feet from them, and Chenle slips an arm around Jisung’s waist. 

He lets out a sharp breath, the contact making him feel like everything is falling in place. He wants to tell Jisung that he can stay, that he won’t leave again, that he can please his own greedy heart, but he can’t. 

“Just for tonight,” Chenle whispers, letting his head drop on top of Jisung’s. 

He feels Jisung nod under him and he balls his free hand up, wishing he could deliver happier news. 

“Come on, then,” Jisung says after a few minutes, standing up and smiling brightly. He stretches a hand out and Chenle doesn’t hesitate to take it. 

“Where are we going?” Chenle asks, looking at Jisung as they start making their way through the sand. The slight wind is whipping Jisung’s hair around, though it seems to only lift Jisung’s spirits as he smiles bigger. He gestures for Chenle to follow him, and Chenle can’t deny him anything. 

Chenle subconsciously tightens his grip on Jisung’s hand. If he’s only here for one night, he’s going to make the best of it. He knows there will be a shitstorm waiting for him when he goes home tomorrow, but now, even though he doesn’t have a change of clothes or a toothbrush, he’s more at home than he ever feels in the city. 

Jisung looks back at him, concern stopping him in his tracks. Chenle tries for a smile because the last thing he wants to do is ruin today by feeling negative emotions. It’s too much, though, and Jisung knows him too well. 

“What’s wrong, Le? Is it work?” Jisung asks gently, though he clearly already knows the answer, his grip on Chenle’s hand softening. 

He pulls Chenle in, wrapping his arms around Chenle’s waist. Chenle breathes in deep, taking in Jisung’s presence. It’s instantly comforting, and all the remaining tension, the dread for the future, melts away from Chenle, even if it’s only for a moment. 

Jisung pulls back, smiling carefully at Chenle, “You ready now? Let’s meet up at the top of the cliff in ten minutes.”

Chenle nods slowly, confused, but he decides to go along with it. Jisung seems very happy and Chenle trusts Jisung. He’s fine with waiting for him.

“Okay, I’ll see you soon,” Chenle says. 

Jisung nods and starts walking, but he doesn’t make it more than five steps before Chenle’s rushing forward, reaching for Jisung’s arm, pulling him around gently, and leaning in to kiss him. 

Kissing Jisung is easily Chenle’s favorite thing to do. Jisung’s lips are soft, his touch is gentle, and it’s all Chenle wants. 

Jisung smiles when he pulls back, his hair a bit mussed and lips tinged a bit pinker than usual. Chenle breathes out too, finally feeling settled. 

“I’ll be waiting for you,” he whispers before heading towards the tall cliff. 

It’s a hike he and Jisung did almost every day during his vacation, just to find a bit of privacy between Jisung’s family and regular customers at the restaurant, as well as avoiding random people on the beach. Besides, it was far prettier up at the top of the cliff, where they could see miles of ocean, and hear birds fly right over them. 

It was especially good for Chenle on days where he couldn’t stop thinking about his father and the expectations Chenle can never uphold. 

The path leading up to the top of the cliff is empty, and Chenle takes his time as he walks. He doesn’t know what he’s doing here. All he knows is that he wants to be with Jisung, and he can’t pretend to want to inherit his father’s company anymore. At least not until he finishes college. 

He takes a seat on the grass when he reaches the top, sighing deeply as he looks over the edge. He’s far away enough that he isn’t scared of falling, but he can see over the edge enough to be amazed by the beauty of the ocean. 

Chenle wonders what his life would be like if he grew up out of the city. Maybe he would’ve had more friends before heading off to college, maybe he would’ve enjoyed being home, instead of avoiding coming home to an empty house. The possibilities are endless, but then Chenle stumbles upon a thought. 

If he had never grown up in the city, he would’ve never come out to the coast for his trip, and he never would’ve met Jisung. 

That thought almost makes Chenle think that living in the city is worth it, it’s worth it since he was able to meet Jisung, but there’s still a pang of hopelessness in his heart.

“I swear that fucking path is out to get me. I slipped like ten times,” Jisung pants as he makes his way over to Chenle. 

Chenle huffs a laugh; Jisung had tripped over the stray tree branches every other day, and it seems like that hasn’t changed. 

Jisung is holding a basket and a blanket, and he motions for Chenle to stand up as he starts spreading the blanket on the ground. 

“You brought food?” Chenle asks, hoping to keep the hunger out of his voice. Jisung looks up with a smile that says Chenle failed, but he nods, letting go of the blanket to reach in the basket and hand him a bag of chips. Chenle catches it and quickly helps Jisung spread the blanket out, before kicking his shoes off and taking a seat. 

“How’s work going? You only have a couple of weeks before the semester starts, right?” Chenle asks, popping a chip in his mouth, before leaning over and putting one in Jisung’s mouth as well. 

Jisung chews before talking, “Yeah, I have two weeks before I’m moving back onto campus. I’m gonna miss the beach.”

Chenle envies that, not the fact that Jisung gets to spend all of his summers at the beach, but the fact that Jisung enjoys spending his summers at home, that he doesn’t dread leaving college and doesn’t anticipate going back. Chenle wants an ounce of happiness that Jisung emanates at his home. Chenle wishes he was excited to take over the family business, instead of changing the subject every time his father brings up the company. 

“I’ve missed the beach,” Chenle hums, putting another chip in his mouth and leaning over to put another in Jisung’s.

“How are you holding up?” Jisung asks carefully, waiting to see Chenle’s reaction. 

Chenle breathes out, turning to look at Jisung, who’s looking at him with his utmost attention. “It’s shitty and I hate it. Now that I’ve tasted freedom, I can’t imagine spending the rest of my life in meetings. I know I’m lucky to have connections and to basically be handed a job, but I want to at least finish university before thinking about taking over an entire company.”

Jisung nods, his eyebrows drawn together, “I know what you mean. You don’t owe it to your father to take over his company.”

Chenle huffs a laugh, “That’s not what he thinks. But I don’t wanna spend the day talking about how much I hate work.”

Jisung nods again, sitting up to reach into his basket, pulling out two sandwiches, two lemonades, and an assortment of fruit. 

“How did you do all this in ten minutes?” Chenle asks as Jisung lays everything out.

Jisung just grins bashfully, pushing a plate into Chenle’s hands. Chenle gets distracted by the sandwich, his hunger clouding his ability to think, and he smiles gratefully at Jisung before digging in. 

They both eat in silence for a few minutes, too engrossed in the food to think about making conversation. It's calming for Chenle, to just have a few minutes to eat and take everything in, without the pressure of making it to his next meeting on time or worrying about schoolwork.

They eat in silence until Chenle knows something is up, when Jisung's only taken a few bites out of his sandwich and he's staring off into the distance. Chenle knows he can't avoid talking forever, so he just waits for Jisung to speak.

It takes a few moments, and when Chenle has swallowed the last bite of his sandwich, Jisung speaks.

"Why are you here?"

He doesn't say it in a malicious way, in fact, it's so soft Chenle's not sure it was even meant for his ears. Still, Chenle's heart drops and he knows he has to explain to Jisung. It's enough that Jisung didn't yell at him as soon as he saw him. Chenle deserves to be yelled at.

"I'm sorry," Chenle starts. "I made a mistake."

Jisung sets his plate down and wraps his arms around his knees, staring out ahead at the ocean, making no move to acknowledge Chenle. He knows he's listening though.

"I never meant to make you feel like I don't care about you. I just... I didn't know how to deal with my problems and I thought that I would just be causing more problems if I stayed here," Chenle says, knowing full well how stupid his logic sounds now.

"It wasn't just your heart you were breaking when you drove away that day," Jisung's voice is barely audible, and if Chenle looks over, he would see the tears welling in the corners of Jisung's eyes.

The words feel like a punch to Chenle's gut anyway.

"I know."

"And now? Why are you back now?" Jisung's trying to hard to keep both the hope and pain out of his voice but Chenle’s gotten accustomed to hearing every emotion in Jisung’s words. 

He swallows, dread dropping in his stomach like a brick, "I don't know. I just had to get out of the city."

"Okay."

"Okay?" Chenle turns his head to look at Jisung, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

He had been angry and hurt just a few moments ago. And now he’s just accepting Chenle's words? Chenle isn’t sure he deserves the kindness Jisung always treats him with. 

Jisung’s still staring out at the water, and Chenle wants nothing more than to reach over and take Jisung's hand in his own.

"I'm not trying to pressure you, Chenle. I'm not trying to force you into a decision. I just want to be in the loop. I wanna know what you're thinking," Jisung's voice is soft, and he finally, finally looks up at Chenle.

There's still sadness in his eyes, but he looks like he's found an answer within Chenle's words.

"What do you think I should do?" Chenle asks tentatively, reaching over to pick up a few grapes from one of the containers.

Jisung taps a finger against his lips, "I'm not sure. I don't think you should completely write off working at your dad's company because it is a good opportunity, but I think you should talk to both of your parents about maybe only working summers and how you want to focus on university before seriously starting to work at your dad's company."

Chenle nods, a smile making his way on his lips, "That's not what I was talking about."

Jisung turns towards him, confusion apparent on his face.

"I meant, what should I do about us? I wanna be with you, Jisung," Chenle says softly, heart expanding at the way Jisung slowly turns red, his eyes averting to the ground.

"Oh."

Oh? That's not what Chenle was expecting. He wasn't expecting to be welcomed with open arms either, but he was still hoping.

"Do you... do you not wanna be with me anymore?" Chenle pushes out the words, hating how unsure he is about where they stand. If only he hadn't fucked it all up.

"I do. But I'm scared, Chenle. I'm scared of getting my heart broken again. I'm scared that I'll only see you a few times a year. I'm scared that one day you'll stop responding to my texts and you'll forget about me completely. I've never done a long-distance relationship before," Jisung explains.

Chenle understands. He did something stupid and Jisung is still hurt. But all Chenle wants to do is show that Jisung can still trust him, that he would never hurt him on purpose.

"I can't take away all of your worries, and I don't want to make empty promises. But believe me when I say that I've never had feelings for anyone else the way I have feelings for you, Jisung. I'm willing to put in the work to make sure you never feel like I'm forgetting about you. And besides, I drove down here today, right? I can do it again," Chenle nudges Jisung's shoulder with his own, smiling when Jisung nods.

"Okay," Jisung lets his head fall on Chenle's shoulder and Chenle's heart soars. He grins, balling his hands together to prevent himself from doing something embarrassing like fist-bumping the air.

"Okay?" Chenle still has to double check, just to make sure he isn't dreaming.

"Okay," Jisung repeats, "We can do it. A long-distance relationship."

Chenle laughs, turning his head to press a kiss to Jisung's hair.

"But I have one condition," Jisung's voice turns serious, and Chenle's tempted to agree to it without even hearing him out.

"Sure," Chenle prompts, wondering what it could be.

"You have to send me at least two selfies a week," Jisung says, voice still fully serious.

Chenle breathes out, relief flooding his body. He laughs again, feeling an enormous amount of endearment towards his boyfriend.

"Yeah. Yeah, I can do that. But you have to send me some too! I need Jisung content to get me through my boring ass meetings," Chenle's arms come up around Jisung's middle, humming happily as his eyes flicker down to Jisung.

His eyes are closed but there's a trace of a smile playing at his lips, and Chenle can't help but grin at the sight, stomach fluttering in a new way.

"Come on, let's get into the water. You don't have work, right?" Chenle stands, brushing his pants off, slipping his hand into Jisung's as he stands.

"Nope, no work today. I'll race you, though," Jisung says and takes off, his laughter echoing back as Chenle splutters for a second before he takes off behind him. 

* * *

It's months later when Chenle realizes that he can't keep Jisung a secret anymore. It's during the same time that he realizes that he doesn't  _ want _ to keep Jisung a secret, and that he's come to a decision about his internship at his father's company.

Naturally, he invites Jisung over for dinner. The university he goes to is only two hours away from Chenle's, so it's been easier for one of them to visit the other once or twice a month. It's been going well, in Chenle's opinion. The same can't be said for his internship. In fact, his relationship with Jisung is the only thing going well, and it's the only thing keeping him afloat at the moment.

His father had the groundbreaking idea that because Chenle is in his third year of uni, he would have fewer classes for some reason, and decided to up his hours at the company. Chenle is currently failing two of his five classes and isn't thriving in the other three. Of course, he can't quite tell his father that, so he's doing his best to save his grades without alerting his parents.

Chenle's life is a shitshow, but if Chenle's learned anything from his month-long trip, it's that he can't wait for things to work out. He has to make the first move and actively work towards better circumstances.

So he invited Jisung over a few weeks before Thanksgiving. It's far enough in the semester that both he and Jisung have gotten used to their schedules and can plan around each other.

Chenle can't wait to see Jisung. It's been a month since they last saw each other, and facetime doesn't quite capture Jisung's essence the way being in his presence does. Besides, Chenle just wants some cuddles from his taller boyfriend.

Now, he's breathing in deeply, his hand finding Jisung's under the table. His father is engrossed in his work phone, as usual, while his mother eyes Chenle suspiciously, eyes flickering between him and Jisung.

Chenle suspects that his mother has already figured out what's going on in between them. She always knew these things before he did.

Jisung squeezes Chenle's hand back assuringly, encouraging him to speak up. Chenle blows out a quiet breath, eyes flicking around their dining room, from the family portraits hanging on the wall to the large grandfather clock in the corner of the room. 

Chenle decides to just go for it, before his mom stands to get dessert and his father disappears to take a work call.

He clears his throat, effectively gaining the attention of his father, "I have something to tell you."

His father nods, eyebrows furrowing in concern, "Go on. Is it about the meeting from this afternoon?"

Chenle shakes his head, "No. It's actually about Jisung and me."

His mother's lips quirk up for a second, but it's gone so fast Chenle is left wondering if he imagined it. His father's eyes narrow and he glances at Jisung, an unimpressed look on his face.

"Jisung and I... we're dating," Chenle forces his words out. He can't give himself too much time to think or he'll never get the words out. 

Silence fills the room, the quiet ticking of the clock the only noise audible. Jisung rubs his thumb over the back of Chenle’s hand soothingly, though his grip tightens on Chenle’s just the slightest bit. Chenle isn’t sure he’s breathing anymore. 

"I see," his mother nods after a second, her face giving nothing away.

She doesn't look upset, which Chenle takes as a win. He's too afraid to turn to look at his father's face.

"When did this start?" she asks.

Chenle grips Jisung's hand tighter, and Jisung speaks up for him, "Over the summer. Chenle and I met during his trip out to the coast. My parents own a hotel and restaurant on the beach there."

His mother nods, apparently satisfied with Jisung's answer. Chenle's eyes flick towards the other side of the table, where his father is seated. He's studying Chenle, but he doesn't look angry. He looks mostly like he doesn't care, which is a blessing for Chenle.

"You seem like a nice boy," his father addresses Jisung, then he turns to Chenle, "But work comes first for you."

And there it is. Getting out of here unscathed seems impossible now. Not with the bomb Chenle is about to drop on his family. He could possibly be getting disowned in the next few minutes, if he father is feeling particularly unforgiving. But Chenle can't be afraid. He has to stand up for himself at some point, and now is as good a time as any.

Jisung kicks his foot, reminding him to actually speak, and Chenle coughs.

"Yeah, about that..." Chenle's palms are sweating, but Jisung's rubbing calming circles on the back of his hand, so Chenle can't possibly back down now. He steels himself and continues, "I've come to a decision about my internship."

His father straightens in his chair and his mother sets her chopsticks down, turning to give Chenle their undivided attention. The air is unmoving and Chenle can feel himself clamming up. He needs to keep his composure, but the air feels like it’s choking Chenle.

"My internship is making it really difficult to focus on schoolwork since I'm working almost 40 hours a week. It was a really good learning experience, and maybe in the future I will want to revisit it, but for right now, I think focusing on university is the best option for me." Chenle’s words are formal and hs tone is strictly professional, and he can only hope his parents even try to understand. 

"You're quitting?" it's his mother who speaks first, surprisingly.

Chenle nods, not daring to meet her eyes.

"If you think you're working too many hours, we can cut them back for you, Chenle. I don't think quitting is necessary," his father says.

"No, I need to quit. I can't work there any longer," Chenle's aware he's being somewhat harsh, but his father is insistent, and really good at tricking a person into giving him more than they’d signed up for. Chenle would know. He’s been victim to it for 20 years now. 

"I think a break would be a good idea for him, don't you think, honey? He can explore other options in the meantime, and he will most likely come back to you after graduating," his mother lays a hand on her husband's arm.

Chenle's used to his mother's backhanded support. She always seems to want to side with Chenle, but when push comes to shove, she can never truly step away from Chenle's father.

He pushes down the pain that comes with his mother basically telling him that she doesn't think he'll be successful anywhere other than at his father's company, and focuses on the problem at hand.

Chenle's already sweating under his dress shirt, and his tie seems to be choking him. Even Jisung, who admitted he hates dressing up, seems more at ease in his clothes than Chenle does right now.

His father's face is unchanging as he looks from Chenle to Chenle's mother. Chenle does his best to seem civil and hopeful, not too rebellious, not too overbearing, just simply making a decision that will be good for him in the future.

His father looks at him, clearly thinking about how Chenle's absence will affect the company. It won't be hard to replace him as an intern, Chenle knows. There are hundreds of business students that would kill for the paid-internship that Chenle has now. He knows that maybe he's being stupid for not sucking up his misery and just staying there, but he can't. Not when the thought of going to work the next day keeps him awake for hours at night. 

It takes a few minutes, his father's fingers tapping against the wood table. His mother smiles reassuringly at Chenle and he forces himself to smile back.

"You will be getting another internship though, is that correct?" his father asks, leaning forward, an expectant look on his face.

Chenle was not planning on getting another internship, at least not during this semester at least.

He didn't say that, though. Instead, he smiled, plastering the most flattering grin on his face that he could, "Of course. I'll need to do some research on what types of companies I'm interested in, but I'll be looking."

Technically, it wasn't a complete lie. Chenle did need to re-evaluate what type of work he was interested in, he just wasn't planning on doing it anytime soon. His father didn't really need to know the nitty-gritty details though.

His father nodded, buying Chenle's words, though his eyes are sharp as he looks him in the eye. "Okay. I don't see why you can't take a break from working at the company. More experience is never a bad thing. You can also look into going abroad for a year or two. Finishing up my degree abroad was the best thing I ever did.”

Chenle really wants to scream that he never plans on coming back to his father's company, that he certainly doesn’t want to go abroad, but he's certain that will make his father revoke his acceptance and will also likely lead to Chenle being disowned from the family. It grates against his nerves that his father can turn any situation into something beneficial for himself, but Chenle keeps quiet. He knows when to back down and take what he’s given.

He seals his mouth shut, instead beaming at Jisung, who squeezes Chenle's hand in response, joy bright in his eyes.

The rest of dinner goes smoothly, Chenle's hand linked with Jisung's for the whole night. Jisung gets along well with Chenle's parents, which delights Chenle more than he'd expected.

After finally calling out their final goodnights and goodbyes, Chenle's mother giving each boy a bag full of leftovers and a kiss for them to take to their individual apartments, they head out into the cold night, both of them immediately interlocking their fingers for sharing body heat purposes.

"They seem nice," Jisung says as they walk down the driveway to Chenle's car.

"They are. Until I bring up anything related to work. It's why I avoid talking about work at all costs."

Something bubbles in Chenle's chest as he looks at his parents' house, watching the lights slowly turn off as his parents head to bed. He's always felt confined to the four walls of this home, extending even to university and his future. He's never been able to escape his parents, not until now.

Chenle places the feeling as relief, relief that floods through every vein in his body as he slumps into his seat, bucking himself in.

"This is all thanks to you, Jisung," Chenle turns to find Jisung already looking at him, a soft smile on his face that slowly morphs into confusion.

"Me?"

"Yes, you," Chenle takes Jisung's hand in his own, interlocking their fingers together, "If I hadn't met you, I'd never stand up to my parents like that."

"That was all you, Chenle. All I did was stay with you," Jisung's eyes are wonderous, and he looks genuinely happy.

Chenle shakes his head. Jisung has done so much more for him than that, but he leaves it be for the time being.

"Where are we going now? Your place?" Jisung asks as he connects his phone to the car's speakers.

The soft lofi playlist that Jisung is obsessed with fills the car, and Chenle shakes his head, a soft smile spreading on his face as he backs out of the driveway. 

“How about the coast, Sungie? We can have a picnic on the beach to celebrate freedom. We have the whole weekend,” Chenle can’t stop himself from looking over at Jisung, only to find him already looking at him, eyes affectionate. 

Jisung nods, turning the music up and getting comfortable in his seat. It’s gotten to the point where Chenle doesn’t even need his GPS to get to the coast, he’s familiar enough with the route to know it. 

“The beach sounds perfect, Le.”

As usual, Chenle feels his head clear the second he’s out of traffic and on the freeway, speeding down the road at a speed his mind can never catch up to. The sky is clear, and Chenle is ready. Ready to take back the summer he wasted without Jisung, and ready to take back the years he worked at his father’s company, instead of pursuing his own interests. 

He’s ready to finally,  _ finally _ take control of his life, and with Jisung in the seat next to him, he feels unstoppable. 

* * *

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! leave a comment if you'd like <3
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/haechzens) | [cc](https://curiouscat.me/honeyshyuck)


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